*Super Mayra*
Legendary Poster
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2006
- Messages
- 2,038
- Best answers
- 0
Twenty Clues to Calling it a Night...
top10s
1. I have absolutely no idea where my wallet is. (Or pants... but that's a long story).
2. I believe that dancing with my arms over head and my butt wiggling while yelling woo-hoo is truly the sexiest dance move around.
3. I've suddenly decide I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too.
4. In my last trip to "pee" I realize I now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess I was just four hours ago.
5. I drop my 3:00 a.m. submarine on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it.
6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooo much.
7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.
8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.
9. The person I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.
10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing becomes strangely overwhelming.
11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.
12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.
13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me lemonade, but that's just because I can no longer taste the gin.
14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen floor.
15. I start every conversation with a booming, "Don't take this the wrong way but..."
16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.
17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.
18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be standing) and take a quick nap.
19. I begin leaving the button's open on my button fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the washroom away from my drink.
20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight.
Top Ten Rejected Valentines Day Cards
top10s
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.
9. Our love will never become cold and hollow Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.
8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.
7. This feels so good, it feels so right I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.
6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.
5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!
4. Through all the things that came to pass Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.
3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".
2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!
1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
top10s
1. I have absolutely no idea where my wallet is. (Or pants... but that's a long story).
2. I believe that dancing with my arms over head and my butt wiggling while yelling woo-hoo is truly the sexiest dance move around.
3. I've suddenly decide I want to kick someone's ass and honestly believe I could do it too.
4. In my last trip to "pee" I realize I now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess I was just four hours ago.
5. I drop my 3:00 a.m. submarine on the floor (which I'm eating even though I'm not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it.
6. I start crying and telling everyone I see that I love them sooo much.
7. There are less than three hours before I'm due to start work.
8. I've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to me.
9. The person I'm flirting with used to be my 5th grade teacher.
10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing becomes strangely overwhelming.
11. My eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so I keep them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy.
12. I've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it.
13. I yell at the bartender, who (I think) cheated me by giving me lemonade, but that's just because I can no longer taste the gin.
14. I think I'm in bed, but my pillow feels strangely like the kitchen floor.
15. I start every conversation with a booming, "Don't take this the wrong way but..."
16. I fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when I sit on it.
17. My hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves.
18. I'm tired so I just sit on the floor (wherever I happen to be standing) and take a quick nap.
19. I begin leaving the button's open on my button fly pants to cut down on the time I'm in the washroom away from my drink.
20. I take my shoes off because I believe it's their fault that I'm having problems walking straight.
Top Ten Rejected Valentines Day Cards
top10s
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk.
9. Our love will never become cold and hollow Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.
8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.
7. This feels so good, it feels so right I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.
6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.
5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!
4. Through all the things that came to pass Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.
3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".
2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!
1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
